Two spectacular things happened to me yesterday. Time to do a little writing from my ever busy schedules.
I was about booking my uber when this kind white lady asked me to step aside from the sun. I had even forgotten I was under the sun. She went ahead and asked if I was waiting for my cab or so and when I said yes, she offered to drive me to my destination which was just 7 minutes away.
I was glad and happy she could be of service. I told her to thank you and she left.
Then by evening, I drive into a store to get a few pieces of stuff to make a sweet ogbono soup and guess what and this woman walked up to me and she was all smiles. She had an African American accent which I could tell was 'FAKED' But she was throwing accolades on me, you are so beautiful, your shoes are lovely, your skin tone is awesome...I KNEW SOMETHING WAS UP, I knew she was yet to land so I patiently gave my own FAKE SMILE AND FAKE ACCENT.
Then, she landed - she said, please can you assist me with $3.00? I said, Yes I can, but it will have to be at the checkout counter since I almost never have cash on me. She said, Okay, she will meet me up at the counter when im ready to check out. I said okay, Fine.
THEN, SHE said... I KNOW YOU ARE FROM NIGERIA AND GOD WILL BLESS YOU SO MUCH FOR ME AND YOU WILL HAVE A GOOD HUSBAND BEGGERS
Immediately, she mentioned God, That's when I should have retraced my steps and tell her I changed my mind about the $3;00 Then, I remembered the white lady who gave me a lift earlier and we left God out of the whole business. I decided to do a little more because I am absolutely allergic to bullshit.
I told her, Listen, to me, I know you are Nigerian, I also know you mentioned God and Husband now to sound nice and religious, the next time you want to beg from a girl like me - Just simply beg and keep your prayers to yourself, Afterall you need it more! And, You should also know this, I'm giving you my $3;00 because I would help out when I do have it not because you pretend. I turn around in this store now, I bet you have done this repeatedly to many others.
I went to the counter, I did a cash back and gave her $3;00 and the cashier at the store had a look of disgust on his face. He obviously knew the woman and what she does. He gave me a reassuring look and told me, she just scammed you. I said it's fine, that I know.
If you use that your Nigerian God to come to ask for loan or money from me...That your God Will bless you 'FAKE' Crap - Know this!!! I won't give you.
Allrights reserved, © Collette Orji